Thursday, October 18, 2012

Just Dropping By

This poor neglected blog...almost as neglected as my kids lol!

It's a rainy, dreary day here in the midwest.  It's COLD today.  My heart needs desert temps...and sunshine!  Lots and Lots of sunshine!

We're working on finding a house.  So far ehhh.  Found one that was amazing, but God has ways of working things out..at the last minute, the owner decided to try and sell it instead of rent.  Oh well, nothing lost and there will be other houses.  God doesn't shut a door without another in mind.  

Just have to trust.

Hi, my name is Shelly and I have trust issues...

I was reading in Mark yesterday.  (I find myself being anxious the closer we get to moving..not that I'm not excited about this..it's just out of my comfort zone, but I'd rather be out of my box and in the will of God than comfy and mediocre.)

So anyway, Mark...the first verse that I jumped out and smacked me between the eyes was Mark 5:36---Do Not Be Afraid, Just Believe.   Just Believe..stop thinking with your "what if's" and your perceived truth, Just Believe that God is who he says that he is and his promises are true.

Later on in Mark, Jesus gets annoyed with his disciples (well, at least in my head he sounds annoyed..)   After seeing him do 2 miracles with loaves of bread, the disciples were still worried that on their boat trip they'd run out.   Seriously, he fed thousands of people with 5 loaves of bread and had baskets and baskets of leftovers....

Jesus asks them--Why are you still worried about bread?  Do you still not understand?  How many baskets were leftover when I fed 5,000? 

 (at this point, I'm picturing the disciples looking a lot like my kids when I get after them..heads down, hands in pockets, kicking at the dirt...)   12 baskets...

And how many were leftover when I fed the 4,000?  Do you still not get it?

 ....this is the same Jesus who just walked out on water..who calmed the wind!  

Yet still, they are worried about taking care of their day to day basic needs.

They were still trying to grab hold and control things.   

Control

Such stumbling block for human nature.  For my nature.  I like to be in control.  I like to know all of my options and every step of the plan...to read and reread the instructions just in case I miss a bolt.   

Control and Trust can never be besties.

Control has to be cut off at the knees in order for Trust to grow.

Lord- I believe that you are the God of the miraculous and the ordinary.  You spin the planets in orbit and take care of the sparrow and the flowers of the field, how much more will you take care of your children.  Your ways are perfect, your vision for my life cannot be comprehended...even when I can't see, I trust in your plan.  And when I am filled with anxiety because things aren't working as I think they should, I will praise you for protecting me from things that I can not see just yet!

2 comments:

Michelle said...

Sending you hugs, Shelly. It will all come together...it really will.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

Even if you're not feeling it, keep repeating it and you'll get there. God has the perfect spot for your family.
(Funny--I'm in Mark right now, too! Chapter 4--right behind you!)